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My (f23) bf (m24) has been sending girls money for nudes for the entire time that we moved in togeth (by Sparky)

 Sparky (0)  (30 / M-F / Massachusetts)
30-Oct-19 5:35 am
My (f23) bf (m24) has been sending girls money for nudes for the entire time that we moved in together 1000 miles away

Sorry guys this is still extremely fresh so I?m just going to spend some time ranting.
We?ve been dating for 3 years now and we recently decided to move in together from NJ to GA. Unfortunately since then, I?ve been taking a lot of bull**** and just making excuses for it every time. Looking back, during these times there have been the worst fights that we?ve ever had. He would get mad at me from a night of drinking and leave me in the middle of the city to get home the ?best way I know how?. He would say I?m too needy. I deserve a lot better than that I?m in a strange place with no one that I know or can call. He would go out alone while I?m not there and lie about it. He would go out and get into bar fights and lie about it. I mean the list goes on. I?ve recently been traveling a lot so I haven?t really had time to think about my crumbling relationship until just last night when I asked why he has been recently putting his phone down as soon as I walk behind him or walk towards him. He told me I was crazy, a thing he normally does to get me to shut up about my feelings. However, after he stormed off, I finally had the opportunity to see if my suspicions were true. I found full on messaging with girls about him sending them money to send him nudes in return. This is something that we?ve talked about before. He always said that these type of men are losers and weirdos for paying for something that is free. I find it ironic that this was just guilt talking and he was really the one doing it all along. He has spent over 500 dollars doing this for months. Now that I have the evidence, he?s dead to me. I told him that I know and he has not responded so I think that tells me all I need to know. The part that hurts the most is that he made me seem like I was crazy and constantly looking for a fight when I had my suspicions. I had no evidence so I just took that as okay maybe I am crazy and probably just insecure. This is where I ****ed up. I should?ve never let myself be treated this way. I should?ve never made excuses for his behavior. It honestly hurts so bad. I am a wreck. I don?t know if I can ever trust anyone ever again. I am sad and I am angry all at the same time. I need to believe that true love exists without sacrificing my morals and standards. Does anyone have any advice for me?
TL;DR - I caught my boyfriend of 3 years cheating with online girls sending him nudes for money. Is there any hope for love?


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