My 65 year old dad pretends to faint from anxiety for sympathy and my family believes him. I'm (33) sick of it.

I (33) have two younger siblings: brother (24) and sister (18). My mom and dad got divorced about 2 years ago. I have a family and my brother and sister stayed with my mom to finish school. My dad took it horribly and has become bitter and needy. He's delusional about it and claims he left my mom and he's totally fine in regards to the divorce. I knew for a long time that this was coming, but it took my siblings for a bit of a surprise. My dad has always been controlling and selfish and my mom lived a seperate life throughout most of their marriage (that I remember).
My dad moved about an hour away to live on his sister's property. When he left he caused a pretty big scene. He told us he probably wouldn't be seeing any of us for about 6 weeks so he could adjust. I know he returned to their house the next day, screaming and asking my little sister to pack for him and then offered to show my brother and sister emails between he and my mom that proved she's a cheater. I guess my brother and sister wanted to read it. He left a stack of print outs in an envelop on my porch but I threw it away after reading like 3 emails.
About 6 months after they separated he started having anxiety attacks. They usually occurred in the car when I was driving him places or we would be in public. I have anxiety and depression, what he does seems fake but I'm not a professional. Any time someone disagrees with him or he's not getting his way he starts taking huge breaths and grabbing his chest and screaming. He says he needs to leave immediately or to stop the car immediately. If I tell him we are almost home he starts pounding on the door. I just stop the car and ignore him. But my siblings (and aunt) will get stressed out and dote on him. Once he gets this he stops. I tried mentioning it to my brother but he kinda got ****** at me and said we need to be helping dad so I dropped it. So this has been going on about a year and a half or so.
My time is pretty divided up between family but I spend most of my time with my wife and kids. My kids are in sports and band so I feel like a chauffeur most nights after work. Well now my dad calls all of me at least twice a week to take him to the hospital because he's having an attack and he fainted. I've dropped a few events to take him but as soon as he's in a bed and getting attention it stops. I kind of get an attitude now when he calls me for this. My siblings who, one in college and the other has a girlfriend, never seem to want to take him but tell me I'm being selfish if I pass it off to them. My aunt got more involved and she mostly ends up doing it now but he still calls me. I feel like my dad calculates these moments. Sometimes it's 8am on a Sunday or 11pm on a Monday. Holidays and always on my mom's birthday.
He tells my sister that we need to be taking care of him more and that he had a heart attack from the stress. She cries when he gets like this and my brother is stressed out but mostly avoids family stuff altogether except a few times a year now.
2 events that tipped me over: 1- we all took a trip to NYC for my dad's 65th in the Spring. He never went and neither have my kids or my sister so we were all excited. We got some Groupon deals for hotels for a night and planned to see sights. We all paid for our own tour bus tickets and had a great time for the first several hours of our trip. The bus let's you off and on so we stopped to see the statue of liberty and eat. My dad wanted to eat something specific but missed the stop. Then he wanted to get a beer but my kids were getting tired and wanted to see the park so he had to do without. My sister got annoyed with my dad when he kept bickering about the kids being cranky. When we got back on the tour bus we sat in the back and my dad started breathing in and out and screaming and slamming fists on the seats. It started quietly but I noticed the progression of intensity. I kept hearing him says, "oh no! Not now!" My dad was sitting near my kids and some other kids and started cursing. He screamed "Jake (me), I need you to get your kids now!" I went to get them and they seemed frightened. My aunt and sister moved to sit with him. My aunt is praying and they are helping him breathe but I keep hearing him yell that he needs to get off the bus right now. Everyone is staring at us. My wife is embarrassed and so am I. My aunt tells me to ask the driver to stop the bus but he doesn't understand me. We get off at the next stop and my dad is "weak." My aunt is helping him and my sister is crying and my kids are too. My brother asks my dad what he needs and he says a beer and we need to go to the hospital. After all this, it's getting dark and my kids are tired and hungry so my wife and I leave and forget the park. My sister and aunt take him to the hospital and my brother takes off.
2-Last month my brother and his girlfriend are moving in together and my sister is about to go away for school so we wanted to do a dinner to celebrate at a nice restaurant. My dad's treat. My wife wanted to get a babysitter so it was me, wife, dad, brother, brother's girlfriend and sister. My dad starts off ordering 3 appetizers and drinks. My sister seems so happy about college and my wife really likes my brother's girlfriend. She mentions something about meeting my mom and my dad starts obsessing. My sister notices immediately and starts to ask if he's ok. He starts clutching the table and shaking it. The glasses and plates rattle. He says, "oh no, its coming," and starts to let out little yells and people look over. My wife and I get embarrassed. I tell my dad let's go outside and get air and he responds with a yell as he tries to get up, he asks me for assistance to get up and I help him. He starts shaking and yelling in agony. My sister is really upset and follows us. He says he must be having anxiety because my sister is going away and he's so sorry to ruin the night. He then slowly falls to his knee and closes his eyes. The wait staff has constantly been checking in with us and the manager is behind my dad. My dad opens his eyes and screams ambulance! Another night ruined. My dad left in an ambulance and my wife and I footed the bill. I told my aunt and brother that his behavior seems fake and over the top and he's being difficult and he is suddenly fine with attention. The doctors have found nothing physically wrong and refer him to a therapist (which he won't do). My aunt reassured me his symptoms are very real and she remembers the bus incident and my brother shrugs but kind of says yeah but we need to help him.
My wife agrees with me and this is causing a lot of inconvenience to me. Am I being an *******? I'm not getting anywhere with my family and if I stop helping my dad they will be ******. Everyone seems to think I'm a huge jerk for my opinion. I love my siblings and they look up to me, especially my sister. I don't want to damage our relationship. But my wife rolls her eyes when my dad calls now and gets annoyed when I go help him especially when it interferes with the kids activities. I'm sick of going out in public or doing things with him. I've tried talking to a few buddies but they kinda laugh and don't know what to say. Please Dating.mobi help me brainstorm my options! Should I be helping my dad when he's in need?
Tldr: After my parents split up my dad started having over the top pressing anxiety where he calls me and my siblings frequently to take him to the hospital. He has public scenes and ruins family events. I'm sick of it but my family feels bad and wants to help him. I don't want to destroy relations between family but my wife is annoyed.


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