My [28M] wife [24F] pushed for us to move from a low CoL area to a high CoL area, and is being childish about the adjustments necessary to succeed here. It's impacting how I view her.

tl;dr My wife and I moved from a low CoL area to a very high CoL area. She was the one who pushed me to move, and now she's imploding and crying to go back. I'm losing my patience with her.
My wife and I previously had a comfortable life in a rural state. My income afforded us home ownership, two cars, allowed her to stay at home instead of working retail jobs*, and sent us on two nice vacations per year and many fun weekend getaways. (*I have encouraged her to go to school, but her parents demeaned her intelligence growing up, and now she refuses because she feels incapable.)
Despite our comfort, the intensity of her desire to leave exploded. We had many tearful discussions where she begged me to look for jobs in certain expensive regions that she's always wanted to live. I broke down the financials and showed her exactly what we'd be giving up. She swore up and down that it would be worth it, she was happy to work retail again and rent a crappy place, because the city would be her home and the apartment was just a place to sleep. After a year of chipping away at me, I gave in. I felt like it was give in or divorce her, because she just would not drop it.
After 6 months of searching I landed a good job ("good" enough to afford 2/3s of a gonzo rent), and we moved. It meant my wife has to work a retail job again or we literally cannot afford our bills (before you ask, we live in the most affordable area that's within a 1 hour train ride of my job, and if we move any further away, the rent only goes down nominally and my commute becomes a lot more painful). The sale of our house basically broke even, so we got a small buffer to help us move, but not enough for another down payment (and housing is in the low millions here, so lol @ saving for another down payment anytime soon). I sold my truck and kept my commute vehicle for her to get to her job(s).
Even with all this, I found I love it here. Intellectually, professionally and socially, this place matches me much better than my home state. I even apologized to my wife for resisting her attempts to move, and thanked her for pushing me out of my comfort zone. I know our lives are humble now, but the enrichment I feel more than offsets it. I would love to spend many more years here. It's a special place, and I get why so many pay so much to be here.
It appears to have had the exact opposite effect on my wife. Some of her common complaints: people are cold and there's no sense of community, people are rude, our apartment is claustrophobically small, there's a lot to do but we can't afford most of it, everyone in our social circle and their partner is an educated professional who looks down on her (no one has made untoward comments around me, and I've never observed the judgment that she perceives).
She has left 4 jobs in the past 10 months, and we've had to float with emergency savings every time she rage quits with no back up plan. Some of her complaints are legitimate (she worked in a bar and said she was getting sexually harassed by customers and managers), but some sounded childish (she found the rush of customers too stressful, she was overwhelmed by the mountains of clothes to pick up, the women she worked with were mean to her). Mostly, she cries about how demeaning and horrible retail jobs are. I feel for her, I really do, but she won't learn a trade or get educated, won't get therapy for her anxiety about pursuing further education, and these types of jobs are the only thing she is qualified to do. And she NEEDS to work now. I can't save her from that unless we go back to a poor area.
Now the begging and pleading to move home has started up. I don't have any patience for it this time. It was ****ing huge for me to uproot and come here - I did it FOR HER. Now that I've finally found my footing and am starting to get ahead socially and professionally, she wants to pull the rug out and go back home. Except this time we have nothing to show for ourselves, and will be starting out in the hole.
What can I do for her at this point? I feel like this time around I am going to leave her if she keeps pushing to move, but I feel heartbroken at that prospect.


Source.