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To say goodbye or not? (by LaDawn)

 LaDawn (11)   (50 / F-M / Oklahoma)
1-Mar-14 12:26 am
Y'all share your thoughts with me...

If you find out a friend/relative that you haven't talked to or seen in several years but was once close to was dying wld you travel to them when u find out they only have a few days left?

 

 



Last edited by LaDawn; 1-Mar-14 12:28 am.
 
 
 WalkSoftly 
1-Mar-14 12:31 am
Ive never bn put in a position where I was told one I havent talked to in years was abt to die....if I was, it wld prolly depend on why I havent talked to them and what else I had goin in at the time.

 

 

 
 
 LaDawn (11)   (50 / F-M / Oklahoma)
1-Mar-14 12:41 am
I just am not fully understanding my mommas need to see her g'ma when visiting now isn't really possible...just being at hosp to end. To me if there is no quality time now...then you are just too late...

 

 

 
 
 WalkSoftly 
1-Mar-14 12:46 am
Im wrong guy to ask....my paternal gma died before I was born and maternal when I was 5....

 

 

 
 
 SammyToo 
1-Mar-14 12:51 am
@LaDawn: I think even if they were estranged she should attempt to say goodbye. I made a trip back to my childhood home when I was old enough-and even tho my mama and family were all gone from there it just felt like closure sayin goodbye one last time:)

 

 

 
 
 LaDawn (11)   (50 / F-M / Oklahoma)
1-Mar-14 1:09 am
Not estranged....just drifted into no contact...

 

 

 
 
 SammyToo 
1-Mar-14 1:14 am
@LaDawn: Either way-to say goodbye one last time seems to me a good thing to do...But-I have a hard time makin decisions myself lol, so my best advice is to put yourself in your mamas place...would you want to at least say goodbye?

 

 

 
 
 WalkSoftly 
1-Mar-14 1:16 am
With older people, part of it, I believe, is just being there. They come from a different time....when family was ALWAYS there for another family member....no matter if they cld actually do simething or not.....you were there just in case.

 

 

 
 
 WalkSoftly 
1-Mar-14 1:36 am
Maybe this will help a lil....although it involved my mom and dad.....My dad got sick and ended up in the hospital....had had serious heart issues, COPD....anyway, he had been in two weeks....I was stayin with my mom so I cld drive her up there and back. We wld go at 7 every morn and come home around 8 that night and Id have to drag her away then. One day, I was beat...convinced her to go home at 5. Got her home and she got in the bath.....and the phone rang....was the hospital....my dad had arrested and died alone.......and I had to tell my mom. I felt so BAD... still do occasionally.... bet ur ass when my mom calls now, I drop whatever the hell Im doin and just go


Take the trip, and make it as enjoyable for her as possible....my advice.

 

 



Last edited by WalkSoftly; 1-Mar-14 1:37 am.
 
 
 manondago2 
1-Mar-14 1:45 am
Closure is one of those things you don't reeaally think about, unless you don't have it. Then you think about it a lot.

 

 

 
 
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