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UPDATE: My (24F) boyfriend (26M) has a long time female friend who's clearly into him and I don't kn (by Sparky)

 Sparky (0)  (29 / M-F / Massachusetts)
11-Apr-21 11:40 pm
UPDATE: My (24F) boyfriend (26M) has a long time female friend who's clearly into him and I don't know what I should do.

https://www.reddit.com/r/relationshi...g_time_female/
After reading the comments I decided to just bring it up with him without telling him what I want him to do, to avoid sounding controlling.
I sat him down and told him that some of the stuff that she says really makes me uncomfortable. I told him that I feel like she's undermining our relationship. I gave him a few examples of the stuff she said and done that I didn't appreciate. He still doesn't think she's into him. He's convinced that she's acting this way because she probably feels like they're drifting apart as friends because he's in a serious relationship now. Which frustrated me a little tbh because its clear to me that she wants him but being subtle about it.
He said that regardless of her intentions, if her actions are making me uncomfortable. He'll have a talk with her about it. I was really happy he said that, because I was really nervous and anxious to see how he'll react. I was afraid he'll take her side.
He can be a dummy sometimes so I was worried that he'd bring it up with her in the wrong way. Like saying "my girlfriend doesnt want us talking anymore" and stuff like that but he nailed it. He told her in a text "Dude, I noticed some of the stuff you've been saying in front of my girlfriend lately and I've been wanting to talk to you about it. It's mad disrespectful and uncomfortable. We're cool, but just stop that s**t". Naturally, she acted all innocent and confused. She was like "what? you know I'd never do anything that would upset you" "I think you're misunderstanding" and stuff like that. He doubled down on it though.
I could tell he felt somewhat guilty telling her off like that and I don't know if he's convinced that she's trying to undermine our relationship or not, but I'm so glad that he had my back in this. I'm honestly kind of glad this whole thing happened. It gave me a better idea of what kind of man he really is. He even said he'll stop hanging out with her alone if it makes me feel uncomfortable. He was also, lowkey mad at me for waiting this long to tell him I was uncomfortable around her.
Safe to say that the best possible outcome happened. He really put her in her place and ngl it made me feel real good. All I could think of was "I WON!!!" lmao. Thanks to everyone for encouraging me to tell him because even though I knew that's what I should have done I was still scared to do it for some reason. I even thought about potentially just avoiding her for good. Which sounds ridiculous now that I think about it, because I shouldn't have to hide from her. I guess I'm just not good at confrontations.
Thanks for the helpful advice everyone.
TLDR: I told my boyfriend that his friend's actions were making me uncomfortable because she's clearly into him and she's undermining our relationship. He let her know that she has to stop and totally had my back during the whole thing. All and all everything turned out pretty great. Thanks to everyone for the great advice.


Source.

 

 

 
 
 DearJohn (6)       (64 / M-F / Arkansas)
12-Apr-21 12:08 am
Take them to the Jerry Springer show

 

 

 
 
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