UPDATE : my [24f] partner [24m] doesn’t do things unless I specifically ask him to. It’s driving me insane

original post
Hey everyone, I wrote this post just over a month ago, and i got a lot of advice and help and thought I should do an update.
I took a lot of your advice. I spoke to him about it again, and said we need to come up for a solution because I couldn’t go on with such little help anymore.
We wrote a list as someone had suggested . (Sorry I don’t know how to link usernames) and I wrote what I do and he wrote what he did. My list was much bigger than his and he said he didn’t realise How ‘unequal’ the lists were and he thought we were doing pretty much the same. He thanked me for everything I did, and said he’d change.
We take it in turns with the nappy changes and the story times etc and it’s working very well.
Now we have certain things we both need to get done. He will bath the kids on the nights he’s home so he gets to spend more one on one time. He’ll read stories and is being much more involved.
I still do a lot which I’m fine with, (the things SAHP do) but I want to stay home with the kids and do the majority as I feel that’s what I’m happiest with doing. I’m just appreciative of the help he’s now giving me. I don’t feel alone anymore.
I think with a new baby and a toddler and working full time, it was getting a bit on top of him but we communicate better and when he’s feeling overwhelmed, I’ll do more and vice versa.
I do think I have to ask him some things still, but I feel like that only happens when we have had a bit of a busy/hard day. but we have more of an understanding of one another now.
We also read the articles commenters recommended and that is definitely in the back of our mind.
I do feel I got into the habit of doing things myself and would bathe and read, etc without really giving him that time and now I’m encouraging him even more to do things one on one with the kids. As I was always there when he was spending time with them, I’m trying to make it where he actually gets alone time with them as well. As I think that was making him feel like a “secondary “ parent if that makes sense. He has a much better bond with the kids now, and we are all so much happier. As a family and us as a couple.
I might have missed things so if you wanna know anything else ill answer. I know this isn’t the most amazing update and it’s just a case of communicating better but you’ve all helped so much and I’m very appreciative. I love Dating.mobi!
Thanks for all your comments/advice.
TLDR : a case of communicating better and following your advice has helped us thanks so much


Source.