I (25F) think my family still thinks I'm the teenage freak I was in high school. Sister (27F) tried hiding the fact from me that I would be picking up her boyfriend and her from airport.

Me and my older sister are not close. We were close as kids and less so as teenagers. As a teenager, I would tell her everything and she would tell me nothing. We never had a relationship where she was open with me. Our mom was abusive and our dad was negligent. I had low self esteem and didn't feel loved. I was desperate to bond with my sister, the one person who was in the hellhole with me. She knew everything about me and I knew nothing about her. I kind of obsessed about trying to find out everything about her. I was desperate to form a relationship. I always tried to convince myself that we were close, but we never were really. I would want to know, who her friends were, what books she liked. I was a creepy, lonely, and desperate child looking for attention, love, and affection from the people physically closest to me. My sister just so happened to fit the bill. She went off to college when she was 17 and I was 15. We haven't lived under the same roof for 10 years and haven't spent more than a week together at a time.
My sister asked via text, "Oh, OP can you pick me up. I have a lot of luggage and you have an SUV." I told her yes. My mom then posted in the family text group, "OP, you're picking up your sister and boyfriend right?" My sister wrote, "You ruined the surprise mom!" My dad, my mom, my godsister, and even my best friend (who is friends with my sister) knew this guy was coming. I asked my sister about it. Sister: "You always obsess over what I do. You would have obsessed over him. I wanted it to be a surprise, so I didn't tell you." Me: "I figured out months ago you had a boyfriend." Sister: "Who told you? I told them not to tell you." Me: "I figured it out when you asked for medical advice on birth control. I'm not a ****ing idiot."
Later found out my "best friend" knew and regularly talks to my sister. I don't mind then having a friendship. But I have a feeling they talk about me behind my back. My best friend witnessed me have a mental breakdown 4 years ago. I think all he sees is the fragile, mentally ill girl with no friends. He's around me out of pity.
I realize that I'm still that ****ing 15 year old in her mind. Yeah, I obsessed. I had no one else but her. No friends, no stable parents. Just a sister who couldn't even try to bond with me. I was the school freak no one wanted to be around. I was a suicidal teenager with an eating disorder, severe bonding and mistrust issue. I was that creepy kid in the corner who everyone labeled as a freak.
Part of me wanted to become my sister. She was always prettier than me, smarter than me, skinnier than me, more Asian looking than me. We're biracial and I always looked more black, and my mother would prey on that. My mom always regretted having the "children of a n!gg3$." I had an afro, wide set nose, and "dirty features." My sister was also abused, but I bore the brunt of it. Luckily, she was born with straight hair, monolids, and an "exotic beauty."
I've done everything in my power to change. I became a nurse to help other people. I've become perky and talkative on the surface. I've got my issues, but I've worked hard. I've been in therapy for a few years now. I feel like the only person who has acknowledged my progress is my therapist.
I'm just angry that my sister still sees me as that teenage freak who constantly compared herself to her. I can't be trusted. I haven't grown. I'm still a freak apparently. I just feel incredibly alone. To be kept in the dark. To be so unknown. I don't want this family. I'll forever be that 15 year old who no one could try to understand or love.
TLDR: Sister kept it from me that her boyfriend is coming for the holidays, even though I apparently have to pick them up. My parents and family friends knew he was coming. Sister's explanation is that "I'm obsessive." I've grown over the past 10 year, but I will always be the teenage freak in her eyes.


Source.