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WIBTA if I end a friendship over a scone? (by Sparky)

 Sparky (0)  (29 / M-F / Massachusetts)
8-Apr-21 6:35 am
WIBTA if I end a friendship over a scone?

TLDR: my friend accused me of messing with his scone. I did not. He calls me a liar and won?t let it go.
I apologize for how long this is. It is VERY dumb.
My (36F) friend (of 10+ years) we?ll call Jonah (34M) got dumped by his partner that he was living with. They gave him only a day to move out, assuming Jonah would go live with his religious nut of a mother. After literally talking him off a ledge, I offer to come pick him up (driving out of state and back) and let him stay at my place for the weekend while he gets his head on straight.
Jonah spends the weekend complaining about his ex and the state his life is in. I show him empathy and encourage him to seek therapy to deal with his onslaught of emotions. I tell him about my time in therapy for my binge eating disorder. This will be important later. He agrees to seek help and even has a nice long call with a therapist who validates his feelings.
Sunday comes and Jonah heads to the corner caf? for breakfast. He comes back to my place with a box of assorted pastries including a mixed berry scone. He opens it up in my kitchen, checks the merchandise, and places it back in the bag. He then goes to change in my bedroom while I eat my own food in the kitchen. Jonah comes back and checks his pastry box once more, only to find the scone broken into three pieces.
Glancing at the scone in question, I see that there is a large strawberry on one piece right where the break is and the dough was likely very thin in the center surrounding it. I tell him as much as he tries, unsuccessfully, to put the pieces back together. He then asked me if I messed with his scone while he was out of the room. I tell him no and say that it probably broke when he put the box back in the bag. He claims that there is a chunk missing from the center and it was obviously tampered with. Jonah goes on to say that he is very good at putting things back together but these pieces don?t fit so I must have messed with his food. Again I tell him I did no such thing but would be happy to walk to the caf? and get him another scone. He says he doesn?t believe me. I ask if he is calling me a liar to which he replies that he highly doubts I am telling the truth because the scone breaking makes no ?scientific? sense. I respond by saying something along the lines of ?what makes more sense, a scone being crumbly or your good friend messing with it and lying about it.?
He says to forget about it and asks me to drive him home. I oblige.
On the drive back, he clearly hasn?t let this go. I state my case again, he states his. We are at an impasse. He then says that he can accept that I didn?t mess with his food ?for the sake of our friendship.? The subject is dropped.
Then, this morning, we have the following conversation via text:
Jonah: Too bad we didn?t get to watch that movie on Sunday.
Me: I was quite upset
Jonah: Ok Jonah: You deal with that
Me: I have, wrote out my feelings and trying to release any lingering sadness
Jonah: I hope that works for you
Me: Usually does. It?s a good habit for me. I?ll write things out then go over it in therapy
Jonah: So you?re gonna tell your therapist that I was bugging even though I didn?t go on a roller coaster with that bag of pastries lol. And it didn?t make physical sense according to like science and **** lol
Me: I?m gonna deal with my hurt feelings over being called a liar in a situation where I wasn?t lying. Brought up a lot of feelings about my last relationship that I need to process.
Jonah: I?ve gotten those items many times also and that?s the first time that happened so it seems weird Jonah: Call it what you want Jonah: The one that I had the day before didn?t magically break apart into pieces that can?t be put back together lol
Me: I thought you were over this. I don?t see the need to rehash something that we can?t agree on.
Jonah: I just want to tell you that I am a person who can put almost anything back together. If you give me all of the pieces Jonah: I don?t feel like all of the prices are being given here
Me: I understand and validate your position. I, however, know that I am not lying.
Jonah: Ok. So this has nothing to do with the things that you?ve been seeking help for? Jonah: I feel like there?s something that you?re not willing to tell me
Me: Are you implying that my eating disorder made me take a piece of your scone? Me: Stealing food is not something I have ever done. I binge eat. That means I consume large amounts of food in one sitting. I don?t pick at the center of another person?s pastry and leave the rest. I buy four of my own and eat them all. Me: My eating disorder leads me to purchase large amounts of food for my own consumption. It does not push me to eat the food off other people?s plates or anything like that.
He has not replied.
This is probably the dumbest thing two adults in their 30s could fight over. I?m at the point of ending the friendship because he trusts his own scone assembling skills more than he trusts me. I feel like it?s up to him to either believe me or let it go. He seems unwilling to do either.
Would I be the ******* if I ended our friendship over a scone? Should I just chalk it up to him being upset by his breakup?


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