Let me preface this poem by saying the following:

I have a history of Terrible Anxiety, severe depression, Suicidal Ideology, and a VERY complicated and traumatic childhood. I was even hospitalized in December, due to a suicide attempt. Sometimes, in a moment of panic or heartbreak, we don't think clearly. We don't see the big picture, and look for an easy escape. I am by no means a perfect person, and I am well aware of that. Someone who contemplates, or even attempts suicided is going to do it REGARDLESS of what anyone else has to say. I have overcome my issues, but they are still there. I guess that my point is that NO ONE is to blame for the actions of a disturbed individual. If you disagree, that's fine, I respect that. But do not dare to place blame on anyone other then the person who is the subject of their own illness. I just had to say my peace...

~*~ Brightest sunshine, on my skin.
Open me up, let the light in.
Chase away agony from all of these years.
Chase away trauma, bake away tears.
Doing what I have to, to make the pain less.
I can feel my heart breaking inside of my chest.
Doing anything I can, just so I don't feel.
Not for a second, thinking what to do to heal.
Sobbing on the inside, bleeding on the out.
Alone, as always, I hear me cry out.
I don't know what to do, or even what to say.
I wish this warm sunshine could make it OK.
The day is like I, warm and cold alike.
So I wrap myself up, and inside I hide.
The me that I was, who I used to be.
Inside I hide, the only real me...~*~

Ty for sharing a part of u

It shows great courage to share that part of ur life publicly. We all have our trials and tribulations and they don't define us; how we overcome them does :) Great work darlin

I'm happy to share any part of myself in order to help educate people. Thank you for reading :)

@Ram: I don't know if it's courage... More likely stubborness lol

Thats really touching. And the courage to share that openly is so inspiring...kglad ur here!!

@Kowboy: As I said, Sharing these parts of myself, is my way of reaching out to others. It bothers me that some have such a narrow minded view of people who suffer from these issues. Thank you for reading :)

I cld have wrote ur preface abt me, I am humbled by ur ability to put ur feelings into such moving words. This actually made me cry. I too feel that those that blame others for their actions are wrong. I am impressed that U are sharing urself and perhaps helping others to view the world thru ur eyes of experience, A great big heartfelt thank you!

I sure know what u are talking about i have some of them thing and it is hard what help me is writeing

@LaDawn: Thank you, dearly, from the bottom of my heart. Your kind words are truely felt. I don't mind sharing parts of myself, especially if it means guiding others in the right direction. I have dealt with these things my entire life, and never really had anyone tell me that it was ok, that I would be ok. I'm a fighter, and that's the reason that I am able to be here today, a broken, but sewn together soul. Again, thank you so very much for your words :)